Two Blogs in One

Audrey, back when she didn't care so much...


Have I mentioned that Lila is growing up way too fast? She is a funny baby. She smiles constantly but is a tough one to make laugh. And believe me we are all trying, daily. She likes to stare at her hands like she can't believe they are actually attached to her body. Now she has mastered the skill of getting the two middle fingers on her left hand into her mouth. She used to have to be on her tummy to find them, but now she can do it any old time. Just watching me make lunch for Sammie, she sucks them. I have to pull them out of her mouth to nurse her a lot. I remember Audrey doing that with her thumb.
Speaking of Audrey, she has had a lot of anxiety lately. She feels so worried about messing up, getting in trouble, or ever making a mistake of any kind. I really didn't know she was such a perfectionist until this year! She says it isn't anything her teacher says/does. She watches the "naughty" kids get in trouble and feels terrified she'll be next....for something as small as forgetting a homework assignment. She is also experiencing test anxiety. Nathan says she's "psycho like her mother" and I disagree. It is not "psycho" to worry about remembering things for a test. I am concerned though because I did not experience this until high school. Poor girl. She's much too young for this.
So we've been talking things through every night before bed. Like "what is the worst that could happen"? Ok now, if that happens, will your family still love you? Will you still wake up and eat and breathe all day long? This kind of logic seems to be helping a bit. I even told her, which I'm sure you can't say to every kid, "all I care about is if you do your best- you can get an F and if you did your best, I'll be ok with that." (She is a straight A student so I felt I could say that.)
I sure hope this phase is over soon. Some phases the children go through are easier for me to deal with than others. It is hard to see your child cry every night for whatever reason, but especially because 3rd grade is so scary. If only our adult lives were as hard and scary as 3rd grade!